


Mother's Day

by merlucadevotion



Category: Grey's Anatomy, Station 19 (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:46:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24063793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merlucadevotion/pseuds/merlucadevotion
Summary: It's Mother's Day and both Maya & Carina work through some necessary healing.
Relationships: Maya Bishop/Carina DeLuca
Comments: 7
Kudos: 141





	Mother's Day

Maya sat in her office, deep in thought, staring at her phone with her mother’s contact pulled up. Mother’s Day was quickly approaching and she hadn’t spoken to her mother since that dreaded day she showed up at the office. The day so many feelings and memories that haunted her for so long came flooding back, despite her best efforts to forget. It was also the day she nearly lost the woman she loved. Being so open and vulnerable in such a way was all new to Maya and her defense mechanism was always to push back, despite the fact that her heart was telling her differently.

So, she pushed back. Or she tried to anyway. Carina was unlike anyone she was ever involved with, in the best way possible. After that night, when Carina walked out those office doors, Maya thought for sure that it was the end. Another person she scared away. She didn’t talk to Carina for the next few days and the aching hole in her heart that only Carina could fill only grew more unbearable as the days went by. She missed her, she needed her, and most importantly, she realized, she _ loved  _ her.

Maya had no desire to lose what she had with Carina and she knew in her heart that she had to do something about it before it was too late. Despite her exhaustion from another grueling shift that went late into the night, the pain in her heart outweighed her exhaustion so instead of going home when she left the station early that morning, she went to Carina’s house instead. She had no idea if she’d even be home, all she knew was that she needed to see her and it couldn’t wait. She knocked on the door to Carina’s apartment, she answered and there was a sleepy look in her eyes, which were also red as if she’d been crying.

Without holding back, she laid it all out on the table for her. She told her she loved her, so much that it was consuming her. This situation with her parents had taken its toll and all she wanted right now was Carina by her side through it all. Maya never felt more relieved than the moment Carina uttered the words, “I love you, too.”

Carina walked into Maya’s office that morning with breakfast from their favorite diner they frequented. She went over to where Maya sat at her desk, seemingly deep in thought. She set the bags down on the desk and Maya came out of her daze. “Hey,” Maya said, leaning up to greet her with a kiss.

“Hey. Is everything okay?” Carina asked her as she took their food out of the bags and sat down at a chair.

“Oh yeah, everything’s fine. It’s just..my mom. I have her contact pulled up and I’ve been debating on whether or not I should call her.” Maya explained.

  
  


Carina nodded. “Well, if you think it will help you heal, then you should.”

“I know, it’s just, I’m so angry at her and I’m not even completely sure why, I just am.” Maya said. She was currently in therapy, slowly but surely coming to terms with the fact that what she was subjected to by her father was in fact not normal. She still wasn’t able to call it abuse. But still, it was progress.

“Bella, I can tell you this. You’ll only get one mother in this lifetime. So, if there’s still a chance to make things right, you should try.” Carina told her. Having lost her own mother to illness many years ago, she knew all too well the pain of missing out on precious time you’d never get back, having so many questions unanswered.

“Maybe you’re right. I should try. I guess with Mother’s Day coming up it’s got me feeling a little sentimental. Who knows.” Maya said, shaking her head.

“Right. Mother’s Day..” Carina echoed thoughtfully. This time of year usually brought up old feelings for her as well as grief over losing her mother. A lot of her grief consisted of mourning what their relationship could have been, had she gone to the States with her and Andrew instead of staying behind with her father. For the longest time, she found herself feeling anger towards her mother. Anger for leaving her behind with a mentally unwell father at a time in her life where a young girl needed her mother the most.

However, as she got older, she realized it wasn’t her mother’s fault. She needed to place her blame somewhere and her mother was the easiest target. She realized that for years her dad kept her mom in the dark about just how bad things had gotten. She realized that in the end, they were both the victims.

“Yeah, mother’s day. Got any plans?” Maya asked her.

“No, actually. My mother passed away many years ago.” Carina told her.

Maya’s face fell as she spoke, “Carina, I’m so sorry. I had no idea. Here I am going on and on about my mommy issues - god, I suck. I’m so sorry.”

“Maya, it’s okay. You didn’t know.” Carina said, placing a reassuring hand on hers. “I don’t really have any plans for Mother’s Day. My mamma is buried in Italy so it’s not exactly that easy to visit her grave whenever I like, so I was thinking I’ll buy a bouquet of her favorite flowers then go to the beach to talk to her. She loved the ocean.”

  
  


“That’s beautiful.” Maya said softly. It was at that moment that she decided she should definitely call her mother. She had no expectations for what would come out of talking to her, but deep down she knew that she had to at least try.

Maya mustered up the courage and called her mom later that evening to invite her to brunch that following weekend for mother’s day, to which she agreed.

“And Mom?” Maya said before they hung up. “Would it be okay if I brought someone to join us?’

“Sure sweetie. Who?” Her mom inquired.

“My, umm, girlfriend. Carina. You already met her, actually when you came by the station. It’s just..well, she lost her mom and I kinda don’t want her to feel alone that day. I hope that’s alright.” Maya said.

“Oh, I remember! The doctor. Lovely woman. Of course you can bring her, Maya. That’s very sweet of you.” Her mom replied.

“Great. Well, bye mom.” 

“Bye, sweetie. See you soon.”

  
  


*

On the morning of Mother’s Day, Maya and Carina were at Maya’s apartment getting everything ready for brunch with Maya’s mom.

“Are you sure I should be here?” Carina asked, for the tenth time or so. “I don’t want to impose.”

Maya came up to her and held both of her hands. “Carina, stop it. I want you here. You understand what I’m going through better than anyone else. You’re not imposing at all.”

Carina smiled and placed a tender kiss to Maya’s lips. “Okay.”

Katherine Bishop arrived at Maya’s apartment about an hour later and Maya greeted her at the door. “Hey, mom. Happy mother’s day.”

“Thank you sweetheart. I have to admit I was a little surprised when you called. I know we didn’t leave off on the best of terms last time I saw you.” Katherine said.

“I know, mom. I realize now we’ve got a lot to work through and I don’t expect it to happen overnight but, I’m at a place in my life where I want to at least try.” Maya explained. “I’m seeing a therapist.”

“That’s great, Maya. “ Katherine nodded. “And listen, I know I said some things you probably didn’t want to hear and maybe there was a better way to go about it. This has been hard on me, too.” She looked as if she wanted to say more, but she stopped herself.

  
  


Carina came up to them and Maya took her hand. 

“I know you guys technically already met, but mom I’d like you to meet my girlfriend, Carina.” Maya said. Her mom had been more understanding than she expected once she finally did have the courage to come out to her. She didn’t entirely understand the concept of bisexuality but she wasn’t mailing her pamphlets for conversion therapy either, so it was progress.

“It’s nice to meet you, Carina.” Katherine said.

“You as well.” Carina replied with a smile. “I was just coming to tell you all that breakfast ready.”

“Awesome, let’s go eat.” Maya said as she led the way to the dining room table. However, when she got to the table, a wave of panic suddenly came over her and she couldn’t quite pinpoint why. It was as if a switch in her mind had been set to panic mode. Immediately she turned to Carina and without even saying a word, Carina knew that something was wrong.

“Carina, can I talk to you for a sec please? Privately?” Maya said, attempting to maintain a sense of calm in her tone.

“Of course, yeah.” Carina said, her eyes fixated with concern for her girlfriend.

“Mom, we’ll just be a minute. You can go ahead and start eating.” Maya said as she quickly grabbed Carina by her hand and to her room closing the door behind her.

“Maya, what’s wrong?” Carina asked.

Maya took a shaky breath as she leaned against the door. “I don’t know, I..I don’t know why I did this. What am I even doing? I shouldn’t have invited her, I-”

“Maya, hey, Maya..come here.” Carina said as she gently grasped her shoulders and looked her into her panic filled eyes,

“Remember what we practiced? Breathe. I need you to breathe. Eyes only on me.” Carina instructed soothingly.

Maya took a few deep breaths and was able to regain her composure. “I don’t know what to do, Carina. I mean, the rational side of my brain is telling me that maybe I.m being too harsh and I shouldn’t be this angry at her, but I don’t know where to go from here or how to make any of this okay.”

Carina gently ran her hands down Maya’s arms and felt the moment she stopped shaking. “It’s not going to happen in one day, bella. But this, what you’re doing right now, is a big step. “ She reassured her. “I know how hard forgiveness can be. I was angry with my mom too, for a long time. And it wasn’t until her deathbed that I got the true closure we both really needed. I’m glad we got it, I just wish it had been much sooner.”

Maya paused briefly. “God, I’m being insanely selfish once again aren’t I?”

“No. my love, of course not. I’m glad that I could be here for you like this. Andrea is working today and I didn’t want to be alone and I don’t really have anyone else..” Carina explained, averting her gaze solemnly.

“Hey. No eyes forward, remember? Eyes on me.” Maya said, tilting Carina’s chin so she was once again facing her. “You have me, now. We have each other.”

Carina smiled and nodded her head. “We have each other.” She repeated softly.

Hand in hand, they went back to the table to join Maya’s mother for brunch.

They made small talk about their respective fields which Katherine took great interest in. For Maya, it almost felt like a normal mother daughter relationship, if only briefly.

“So mom, anything new with you?” Maya asked after a lull in the conversation.

“Well, I’m looking at apartments. I thought about getting a house but I figured it might be a bit much since it’s just me now.” Katherine Bishop explained.

It still hadn’t fully processed in Maya’s mind that her mom was really leaving her dad. When she was younger Maya always got the sense that her mom wanted to leave him, but she never imagined in a million years that she’d actually have the guts to do it. Now that she did, she wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

“Maya, I want you to know how sorry I am. I know I should’ve did more to defend you. You were a child, I was the adult. I was scared too, but I know that’s no excuse, and I’m sorry.” Katherine said.

“Mom, you don’t have to-” Maya started.

“Yes, I do. I know ‘sorry’ isn’t nearly enough and I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, but as your mother I just needed to say that. You deserved better, Maya. I’m sorry.”

Maya kept it together for the rest of the meal, said her goodbyes to her mom. As soon as her mom was out the door and long gone, however, it hit her all at once and began sobbing, nearly collapsing to her knees if Carina hadn’t been there to hold her.

She cried until there were no tears left, then stood up, smoothing out her top and holding her hand out to Carina. “Let’s go.”

“Where are we going?” Carina asked quizzically.

“The flower shop.” Maya responded.

Maya drove Carina to the flower shop where Carina was able to pick out her mother’s favorite flowers. Then, the couple drove to the beach, finding a private spot near the water where they could be alone.

Carina closed her eyes and tears fell onto her cheek. She could feel a gentle squeeze to her hand from Maya.

“Ciao, mamma. It’s me, your favorite daughter. I know..I know it’s been a long time since I spoke to you like this. I..miss you so much, mommy..” Carina’s voice broke as she spoke. “So much has happened since we last saw each other. I moved to the US, to be closer to Andrea. I know before you died you told me to look after him and I have. Or I’ve tried to anyway. Oh, mamma you would be so proud of him. He’s an amazing surgeon, just like you knew he would be. He’s..he’s lost his way a little, but I know you’re watching over him.” She paused for a moment then wrapped an arm around Maya. “Mamma, there’s someone here I’d like you to meet. This is Maya, my girlfriend. She’s so beautiful, so strong, with the biggest heart I have ever seen. She makes me so happy. I know you would have loved her.” Maya smiled, wiping a tear away as she listened to this.

“Anyways, these flowers are for you. I hope today you’re up there dancing your heart out to your favorite music at full volume like you always used to do. I hope there’s plenty of strawberry champagne and bruschetta, just for you. Ti amo, mamma.”

There was a comfortable silence between the two, anfd Maya decided they wouldn’t move until Carina was ready. A few minutes later, Carina looked at Maya, a smile on her lips, her eyes still shining with tears.

“Let’s go home?” Carina asked her.

“Yeah, let’s go home.” Maya confirmed. And home was where they went, with heavy hearts and the knowledge that their safe place was each other.


End file.
